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The Cephalopedalis Wars

Goring and Sacher, much to the disgust of the other nazi elite, thought the Nebenwelt other side of the time portal—actually was inhabited with abnormally huge Post-Apocalypto freaks of nature. All of them the result of atomic radiation deformities—and there wasn’t a single genetic deformity that the Reichsmarshal didn’t like. There was no genetic modification ethics panel—to monitor these fiendishly sick genetic experiments by Doktor Sacher and Dr. Seyss-Inquart. The obscene Cephalopedalis in the jar—was just the beginning of a long love affair with Freak Corps Android Boytoys. There was a huge demand for them throughout the Fourth Reich—especially on lonely Mars and Titan far out in outer space. It was just awful—awfully nice. Some had proposed an international tribunal akin to the Helsinki human rights agreement—which would lay out the ethical obligations for such heinous nazi research participants. Others suggested staying in touch with the living Cephalopedalis specimens so they could be consulted on new projects—and because under current practices they couldn’t know about the breakthroughs based on their own DNA because many ended up in jars of formaldehyde on mansion mantelpieces of the rich and famous. Only close readers of nazi scientific journals knew about the atrocious experiments. Complicating matters was the increasing impossibility of ensuring that DNA sizequeen data could remain anonymous. Do Cephalopedalis boyz need to be told that their privacy will be violated constantly and their virginity cannot be guaranteed? Can “blanket” consent up front do the trick—or does tricking trump all the medical and legal schmaltzy bullshit as the young vulnerable harelip-pinheads with gigantic genital deformities get had every night? All 1000 members of the Gypsy Motorcycle Club had signed a consent form stating that their sperm could be used to “study the causes of behavioral/medical...

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